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It's everything I want to tell people when they make small talk and profound talk, but I often can't. Sickness, sex, and the process of dealing with aging parents feel unspeakable and sometimes unreachable, but they sure aren't here.

Sunday, January 01, 2006

I see trashed people!

I will venture out on New Year's Day, and I will deal with people who look like this. They will utter things like "uuuuhhhrr" and "ahhhm." They will be badly dehydrated and poke at me with a prickly attitude. They have scratchy, unseeing eyes and indulge in excessive mouth-breathing. I will intentionally speak louder than I must and slam doors with vigor. Miss Confuckinggeniality does not take kindly to people who induce their own barfing knowingly and intentionally. I will also open strong-smelling jars of condiments near them. Tags: , , , ,

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